5.22.2007

Got Signal?



Finally, what all of us here in the land of gridlock have been waiting for: the ability to use our words, not just our fingers, for personal expression the moment inspiration strikes behind the wheel.

Problem is, for the sailor-mouthed drivers such as myself, inspiration often comes with expletives. Nice how the messages on the ad have banal little blatherings such as "Go Team" or "Hello." You know what we all really want to say is "Get some balls m*therf*cker!" to the folks who choose to drive in the center of the road, at 15 miles per hour no less, through all the little residential streets on my commute around Melrose, turning my shortcut into a slowcut. How about the friendly, but direct "Got Signal?" for all those nimwits who slam on their brakes for apparently no reason then make a breakneck turn without warning? Or, when they cut you off, and, in the language of the dark ages, flip the bird? I'll just click my little remote the scrolling letters will read: "My Corolla eats Bentleys for dinner!" or something clever...

Okay, so that gives us two more phrases to save in my hypothetical frame...comment back and let us know what your scrolling plate would read....Prize for the wittiest, I promise.

5 comments:

-N said...

Okay, so I can't get the link to work , but here it is: skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=102133494&c=

-K said...

I think mine would pretty much permanently say, "Dude, what are you doing?"

-N said...

There will also be a prize for the first person who spots one of these on the road...photographic evidence required, but please don't stop traffic to gather it...

David said...

I can't have one of those. Mine would read "At the next light I'm going to pull you out of your car, curb you, then piss on you like R. Kelly at a girl scout meeting. After that I'll tie you to my bumper and drag you around town like the no-turn-signal-using raging hard-on that you are." That's a little long though...don't know how I'm supposed to shorten that. I could always have "DWA should be a crime". Most of you should know what DWA is...

Allison said...

I think my license plate would alternate between, "Seriously?" or "My other ride is your mom".